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created by Adversarian

Take this test to discover which theological or non-theological practice best suites you. Please answer all questions honestly... Enjoy!

1.) I believe that God...
Is the Almighty Judge and Creator of all things! Amen!
Is the Almighty Creator and loves us all very much. Praise the Lord!
Exists and sent his son Jesus Christ to die for me.
Is the Almighty Judge and Creator of all things whom is both loving and vengeful.
Forget God! We are our own gods!
Is a sadistic creature who could care less about free will and the independence of the human race, so I choose to worship Satan instead, MWAHAHAHAH!!
Is a title. My god is Satan.
Exists, but I prefer to worship his most beloved angel Lucifer. After all, Lucifer is an embodiment of love and liberation, not a villain!
Does not exist!
Might exist. I'm open to an entire host of possibilities.
Is the universal whole comprising of unconditional love and light from which all creation is part, comes from or will return to.
Is some type of cruel joke wedged into a conspiracy between both Jesus Christ and the Easter Bunny?
Is an indifferent force in the universe from which all creation and magic spawns.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

2.) I believe that Jesus died...
So that I could live, and anyone who rejects that gift truly deserves to burn in Hell for all eternity!
Stop right there! No continuation needed. I believe Jesus died, period. Either that or never existed in the first place.
So that I might live. What a wonderful and loving being! ::Cries:: Praise the Lord!
For my sins, so if I accept him I get to enter Heaven. Jesus is a pretty nice guy.
Jesus became sin upon the cross so that sinners like us would have a second chance at life. If we truthfully repent, we can enter paradise. AMEN!!
Oh come off of it! Jesus symbolizes pale incompetence hanging on a tree!
Hmm, Jesus? I'm more interested in calculating the circumference of my grapefruit. Well, that or try to consume hot peppers until my eyes bleed.
For man's transgressions (so the their book says), but honestly, can we get away from Christian propaganda here? I told you, my god is Satan!
You know, if I could locate your right now, I'd stab you six-hundred-and-sixty-six times with a dull dagger. You are a disgust to the Dark Lord!
I know it's a bit Gnostic, but I think Jesus and Lucifer share a type of connection. They were both called Morning Star. I choose Lucifer.
I'm not actually sure if Jesus even existed. I mean, there is the Shroud of Turin and such, but I just can't be sure.
That was really a sad story you know. All those mean people choosing to torment the poor man! Actually, can't we all just get along?
You know, there is a lot of symbolism in the death of Jesus Christ. I'm going to look into it to the end I might learn something.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

3.) I believe that Satan...
Is the fallen angel whom prowls the Earth like a hungry lion seeking whom he may devour!
Was Gods most favorite angel, but lost his way due to pride. However, God has a plan for Satan too. Praise the Lord!
Is evil, I guess. I'll try to avoid him and his temptations.
Was created by Yahweh/Jahova/God in order to give mankind the ability to differentiate between good and evil. Amen!
Might be the evil overlord of an alien planet waiting to snatch us all up and eat us!
Is the symbol for indulgence and the dark force of nature. Shemhamforash!
Is another name for Lucifer and wrongly given! Lucifer is kind, gentle and truly undeserving of all the things people accuse him of.
Is my god! Hail Satan!
I do not believe Satan, God or any other deity figures exist. Clear?
Might exist, but I doubt it, I'm having a hard enough time believing in the possibility of a god!
I think Satan might be real, but I don't really believe in polarities. Can't we all just get along?
Can be applied within my life in a variety of different ways. Mostly in darker rites as another supporting deity.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

4.) You have been told by one of your close friends or relations that they have chosen to follow Satanism as their path. Choose which of the following responses best suits you.
Why choose a looser! You're going to burn forever in the Lake of Fire! Are you really that stupid?
I don't really agree with your choice, because it's not Christian and all, but you have the right to your free will.
Why choose a looser? Jesus loves you! He died for you! I pray that you change your mind before it's too late!
Alright. Know that Jesus will be there with open arms when and if you choose to change your mind. Until than, I shall pray for you.
Hey, did you see my golden apple anywhere? I seem to have lost it again.
Ah... A Satanist. I assume you made the wise choice and went with Anton LaVey's version? All of that deity crap is pure hogwash!
Am I suppose to care? I don't even believe in a Satan!
I guess that's alright since I'm not sure if either Satan or God exist in the first place.
You have made a wise choice! Hail Satan!
Why Satan? Why not Lucifer?
Cool! Want to celebrate black mass with me? You supply the sacrifice and I'll find an abandoned church or something.
Interesting choice of deities. Let's compare notes.
I don't know about all that worshipping evil stuff, but I guess if it's what you want to do... Just keep it away from me.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

5.) Choose which of the following shouts of acknowledgement suits you best.
::Speaks in tongues:: Holy is the Lamb and praise the Lord!
I need a special phrase to acknowledge Jesus? I love him, isn't that enough?
Jesus Christ is my personal Lord and Savior. I will acknowledge him appropriately as circumstance warrants.
Hail Satan! 666!
Hail Lucifer!
Hail Eris! (or) FNORD!
Hail Satan!
Hail Thyself!
What? Are you expecting me to say something? I told you! I don't believe in a god!
I really don't know. I'm not sure if there is such a thing as a god.
Blessed Be!
It is Done! (or) So be it! (or) 93!
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

6.) You are listening to the radio and you hear, Amazing Grace played with drums and accompaniments . Choose the response that suits you best.
I scream at the radio... Lousy new-aged bastards! You're all going to burn in Hell for playing that ungodly music!
I am going to turn the station and listen to something that doesn't involve the idiotic worship of a god!
I'm turning it off as fast as I can because my demon doesn't like it! Damned Christians!
I dance, sing or clap along to the music. Holy is the Lamb of God and praise the Lord!
Cool! I like this song. We sing it in church.
I listen to the music, but than play it backwards to discover if it contains any demonic messages.
Hmm. Drums aren't really suppose to be used for worship, but I'm not in church and it is a song of worship. I will listen and enjoy.
Hmm, praises to God... Well, I'm still not sure such a being exists. I will listen if I enjoy it.
How can they praise God?! How can they honestly do it! He was a tyrant! Lucifer is the true savior and liberator!
I change the station. Perhaps there is something more interesting on the Church of Satan broadcast.
I change the station and find something more palatable. I don't think Satan supports His followers listening to Christian music.
Merry Meet, friend. I think that music is pretty. I'm going to enjoy it.
It's really not my taste and there isn't much I can learn from it. I turn it off and go study for a while.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

7.) Upon death, what is your next destination?
I'm going to Heaven and all you evil Satan loving sinners can burn in Hell!
Praise the Lord! I'm going to Heaven! ::Speaks in tongues again:: Holy is the Lamb of God!
If I live a good life free of sin, I go to Heaven where all my loved ones will welcome me.
Well, it depends if I live my life according to God's will. I believe I will most likely be resurrected into a new body and enter the New Jerusalem.
I die. What's your point?
I'm really not sure.
I will die and become a vampire or an alien or something more outlandish and devour you! YUM!
I shall be remembered by the legacy I leave.
Forget Salvation! I'm damned baby!
I will enter the Kingdom of Hell and rule there with Lucifer for all eternity.
I will enter Hell. Period. I am not certain if I will rule there, or even if it's a place
Somewhere beautiful where I can be with all of my friends and family. I don't believe in a Hell.
While my flesh feeds the Earth, I shall go on to the next level of existence.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

8.) How did human life originate?
It all started with this thing called the BIG BANG! Don't you know anything about SCIENCE?
When was the last time you sinners read the Book of Genesis?
God did it! Praise the Lord!
The answer to your question is written in the Book of Genesis. Perhaps you should read the Holy Bible?
I guess it all started with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. I'm not really sure. I'll know when I get to Heaven.
Via the dark force of nature we call Satan.
I suppose evolution is possible, but it's really not important to me. I live my life in the NOW. Hail Satan!
You know, I'm inclined to think Lucifer was actually the true creator of humanity. After all, we're most like him.
Who cares? God is an evil bastard and Satan rules! Hail Satan! 666!
I'm not sure. Evolution makes some sense, but it doesn't really account for everything.
From a super large green chicken with orange eyes and a snake-like tongue.
From the universal whole comprising of unconditional love and light.
I philosophize on humanity's creation, but I'm more interested in living my life in the now.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

9.) I think the 'miracles' of Jesus Christ were...
Figments of the imagination or purely an accident of psychology! I don't believe in any deities already!
SEE! Jesus used magick too!
Fraudulent wastes of time. I'll wait for the Antichrist thanks!
Possible, but I'm not sure if I believe in the whole story about Jesus being the Messiah or anything, much less any deity.
Jesus again? NO! I want to find the Necronomicon that is supposedly written in human blood and bound in human skin!
Proof that you should repent and be saved by the blood of the lamb!
Wonderful and real! ::Cries:: Holy is the Lamb of God! Praise you Jesus!
Proof of the divinity of Jesus whom is a display of glory to the Father in Heaven.
Nothing that I could not achieve myself using either stage magic or some form of manipulation. Hail Thyself!
Possible, but I'm really more interested in his connection with Lucifer...
You know, Jesus was really a great guy. I think the Christians have it wrong though. ::Purifies circle from demons::
Really, do you have to keep mentioning Jesus Christ? It's getting irritating. I serve Satan and don't worry on the doings of an infidel.
Something that hasn't been mentioned here.

10.) Why is there evil in the world?
It's just the way things are. Now, can I get back to my Evolutionist verses Creationist debate?
I don't really know if there is a Devil or a God for that matter, so I suppose it's because mankind has the ability to do both good and evil.
Because Satan prowls the Earth like a hungry lion seeking whom he may devour. Didn't I just answer this?
Because the Devil likes to tempt mankind to sin against God the Almighty. However, all things that God creates has a purpose.
Evil? I don't focus on evil! The Devil is under my feet! ::Speaks in tongues::Holy is the Lamb of God!
People were made able to do both good and bad. I think it has something to do with Adam and Eve, but I just try to be a good person.
Because there are people like me who answer every question with the more outrageous answer. I hate conformity! Hail Eris!
Evil is a perception, but I do love to manipulate people for my own gain. Hail Satan!
Because I exist, MWAHAHAHAHA! Hail Satan! 666!
Because God is sadistic and cruel. Stop blaming Lucifer! He didn't do anything wrong. He just thought for himself!
I do not care. I count myself as a god, so I am capable of both good and evil. However, I think evil is just a perception.
I don't personally follow evil, but I do understand there are polarities or at least the illusion of such.
Evil? Oooo... Can't we all just get along?

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